Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize