Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Randomize