at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Is it because I queefed?
is this the sara with the beer cane?
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
She drunkenly texted me about Japanese mythology at four AM. I think I’m in love.
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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