haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
Randomize