Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
