He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize