i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
they need to just BURY HIM!
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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