i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
Randomize
