i just had sex bonerless
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
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