So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
it's great music for shaving your balls
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
