I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I somehow turned head, shoulders, knees, and toes into a sobriety test
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Like every two minutes he would pull out and whipser "don't you do it, you bastard" while looking at his penis. His new name in my phone is 'penis whisperer'
Randomize
