My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Babe! I just farted and I swear to jesus lord christ that it sounded like ur name! Ok, more like Meeatt but still... awesome.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
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