If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
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