Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
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He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
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Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....