Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Went from beach to class to bar all while wearing my swimsuit as pants. Clearly I'm dressed for success.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.