just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
