Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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