Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hello my rib-scented angel!
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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