erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
home. puking in laundry basket.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
