i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
You took your shirt off at the bar, handed it to a girl, and made her wash your dirty shirt on your washboard abs
tuesdays get the best of me...
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