I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize