I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
