whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
