My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Actions speak louder than pants.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
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