she looked like the bat from fern gully.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
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