I wish I could punch you in the face.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
He's a Shit stain on my heart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Randomize