I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Randomize
