Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
Randomize
