I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
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