i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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