I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
