It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
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