I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
