The maid of honor just puked.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
Just invented taco cereal.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Randomize
