All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
I just remembered you had me meet your law professor while I was wasted...how'd that go?
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize