i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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