I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
Im dancing with my grandma to Low right now at the wedding. There's no coming back from this.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
Randomize