Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
I've seen too many naked penises for this to be a normal Monday morning
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
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