Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
