His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I'm reciting my presentation (beer in hand) on the porch to a snowmen audience.
took adderall before wrapping presents, ended up making paper snowflakes for two hours
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
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