Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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