I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
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