I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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