she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
