Fuck u you updated twitter but didn't answer my text
I know you're alive
I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
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