I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
Im just a social blackout drinker.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
