i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
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