Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These are your "grown up" slampiece's new hours of operation; please plan accordingly
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
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