You work out of a Hotel?
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
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