there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
You showed up at 4 a.m with two middle-aged men, a 200 dollar bottle of wine, three bottles of beer, no shoes on, and a half eaten red velvet cake.You are never drinking absinthe again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize