i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I ended up in th ER yelling my height weight and age
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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