I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize